Depending on you
by 3DBABE1999
Summary: SPOILERS for everything up to Promos for Season 9 Episode 10.. BLANKET WARNING... Rated "M" for a reason... SUMMARY: The message in Dean's eyes was written in green flames.. "Save Sam or kill him."...
1. Chapter 1

"Depending on you."

A/N: WARNINGS: SPOILERS for everything up to the Season 9 Mid-Season Cliffhanger and the promos for January 14, 2014's Episode.. BLANKET WARNING covering anything and everything that may be offending, triggering or upsetting in any way shape or form… NC-17 Rated type things such as: Foul language, mentions rape of a Main Character when they were still underage, mentions of past suicidal thoughts and actions, mentions of child neglect, mentions of verbal abuse towards children and adults, mentions of physical abuse towards children and adults, mentions of mental and emotional abuse towards children and adults, mentions of Non-Consensual drug use, mentions of alcoholism, lots of blood, guts and gore, torture, etc.. Will all be strong themes in this work of FICTION…

I do not own anything having to do with Supernatural and I am not making money off of this FICTISOUSLY based story that is based off of the FICTISOUS Canon of a FICTISOUS T.V. Show that is based off of lots of FICTISOUS Mythologies, Legends and Lores.. That can actually be researched as if it were all fact. (Which I do, I do TONS of research on all of the 'REAL" Lore that I can get my hands on (Thank you Internet.)..).. Also.. There is tons of STRONG RELIGIOUS themes that will be present in this work of fiction and I don't own the rights to The Bible, The Quaran or any Religious texts nor do I own any Religion that any Religious text is based off of..

Please do not flame me… This FICTISIOUS story is based off of well researched Canonical lore as well as well researched 'real' lore…

CHARACTERS: Sam, Dean (OBVIOUSLY), Gadreel (It can also be spelled Gadriel.), Crowley and Castiel… For now… Hehehe… Almost everyone who's read my other stuff knows how I just LOVE to throw in little surprise twists!

A/N: Based on a combination of beliefs and lores, this is what I've come up with: When GOD decided to create HUMANS there was actually some trial and error…. AND... According to some obscure lores… Lillith (A FEMALE) was GOD's first human like creation… Oh and Adam (The first MAN) totally bit into the Forbidden Fruit before Eve did…

ANYWAY… Onto the story….

"Depending on you."

When Castiel arrived at the bunker he found Dean sitting beside the body of Kevin Tran.

"Cass." Dean croaked. The man had definitely been crying. "Bring him back. Please, bring him back."

Dean had been praying the same thing over and over, for more than an hour, but Castiel didn't know if Dean meant Kevin or if he was just pleading for his friend to bring his brother back home.

Castiel knelt down next to Dean and was finally able to see Kevin's face.

And then he found himself wishing that he hadn't looked.

"Dean, I'm so sorry."

"Why?" Dean whispered "Why are you sorry? I did this. Me. This is my fault. This time.. It's all my fault."

"Dean, you couldn't have known…"

"Yeah… But I did know Cass… That's just it… My gut, my instincts kept telling me that something was off about that son of a bitch and I ignored it… All because I was so freakin desperate to save Sam." Dean let out a humorless, self-deprecating chuckle "Now that I look back on it and think… I mean, really think… There's no hoop I wouldn't have jumped through if that bastard had told me to if it meant getting Sam healthy again… I would have done anything Cass. Any damn thing he said and all he would have had to do to was say that it was to help Sam."

"Dean… What is this?..."

"Well, I really mean anything Cass… How sad is that?... I would have lied… Actually I did lie… But I would've kept lying, I would have stolen, cheated… I would have killed…. I would have done anything… ANYTHING…"

Castiel looked around at the bunker and felt angry at himself for not having been able to get to Dean sooner…

There were half empty liquor bottles littering both of the tables in the library. Apparently, Dean did just about as well with being without Sam as Sam had done with being without Dean.

"You're drunk." Castiel stated. Kevin's body was still laying in the floor and Dean had went and gotten drunk.

"I couldn't bury him Cass." Dean cried "I couldn't salt and burn him… I just… I couldn't."

"Dean…" Castiel's tone was laced with sympathy, regret and remorse… This was just as much on him as it was on Dean, after all.

"There has to be a way." Dean stated, his voice sounded so distant, like Dean wasn't really there. "There has to be a way to get them both back… We have to get them both back."

"Dean, Kevin is gone and I fear that it may be too late to save Sam."

"No." Dean growled. "You do not… You do not tell ME that there's nothing we can do for either one of them!"

"Dean, Kevin's soul is beyond the reach of everyone except Metatron, now and it's possible that the angel who possessed Sam has sent Sam's soul to a place that's beyond reach as well."

Dean let out a frustrated snarl as the punch he landed on Castiel's jaw did nothing but hurt his hand.

"My brother is not dead! Don't you ever say anything like that again! Do you hear me?!"

Castiel only gave a sympathetic nod.

"He's still in there. We just have to find a way to get that winged asshat to give up the driver's seat long enough for Sam to eject the bastard." Dean wiped the fresh tears from his face then looked as if he was refortifying his emotional barriers as he finally allowed himself to actually touch Kevin's body.

"Kevin… Wherever you are, if you can hear me… I am so sorry." Dean whispered reverently then just like that… All of Dean's walls came back up and he was back to the stone cold, sharp edged predator that a year of Purgatory had turned him into.

Dean gathered Kevin's lifeless body and carried him into the room that was once Kevin's where he wrapped him in the bed sheets and once he was done he sat Shiva beside Kevin's body for three days, because Kevin was family and he was going to damn well get the same consideration he had given to every other member of his family who's died.

During the four days that Dean had needed for Kevin's funeral, Castiel had known to keep his distance, especially if he was going to try to mention how improbable it was that there was still some way to save Sam…

But now, Cass couldn't keep quiet anymore. He couldn't let Dean keep on like this. It was wearing him down.

Dean was acting like a lunatic with the way he was drunkenly tearing books from the shelves in the bunker's library, constantly muttering that one of 'the piece of crap books in this place' should have (had to have) an answer to how he could get his brother back alive in between drinks of Scotch or beer. And when he wasn't tearing apart the bunker's library, he was down in the shooting range emptying clip after clip until his arms grew so tired that he couldn't hold up the gun anymore.

The only differences between Dean right now and how Sam was after Lillith killed Dean was that Dean had thicker walls and a better poker face. That and Ruby wasn't around to screw with his mind. But other than those few, small differences it was just like watching the same thing happen all over again.

Castiel's about to hate himself.. But he either has to tell Dean that Sam is gone and that he has no choice but to let Sam go and hope he takes it well... OR… He's going to have to tell him that Crowley might be the only being that can possibly help save Sam now and hope that Dean doesn't do anything stupid like letting Crowley talk him into a deal.

Yeah… He's really about to hate himself…

"Crowley could cast the angel out." The mere thought that he's actually saying it out loud makes Cass hate himself even more.

Dean's face stays impassively blank. He just nods and moves away. Turns his back to Castiel then says. "We need a plan."… The cold, hard edge to Dean's tone is different than anything Cass has ever heard Dean use before, even on the worst days in Purgatory, he hadn't ever heard Dean sound like that.

When Dean turned back around though, his eyes were what sent chills down Castel's spine… The Dean before him was an entirely different person than the Dean he had known.

Castiel never thought he would see the day when Dean willingly decided to take up arms against the vestige of his brother, but when Dean picked up an angel blade... The message in Dean's eyes was written in green flames. "Save Sam or kill him."…

It was that instance Castiel realized that there was a big difference between Sam and Dean…. There were lines that Sam wouldn't willingly cross, even to save his brother… But with Dean… Well… THIS Dean… There wasn't going to be a line he left uncrossed even if it meant losing his brother…

TBC…

A/N: I know… But I'm working off what I saw in the Promo… ANYWAY… Thanks for reading and as always… PLEASE review!


	2. Chapter 2

"Depending on you."

"Maybe you should at least hear what Crowley has to say."

Yeah… Cass really, really, REALLY hated himself.

Why the hell couldn't he just keep his mouth shut?

"Because you're the reason Sam and Dean are in this mess." A voice that sounded like his own, whispered from inside his head. "Out of everyone, you're the character that's done the most damage in this story… After all, you're the one who's really responsible for Lucifer being freed from The Cage. You're the one who brought Sam back without a soul, YOU made a deal with Crowley. You're the one who cracked open Purgatory and let the race of Leviathan loose and you're the one responsible for helping to cause the angels to fall from Heaven."

The voice was right. He had done all of those things and more.

"You feel guilty Castiel." The voice whispered, but now it was beginning to sound like Metatron's voice "You want to make things right."

By the time he realized what was happening, it was already too late. Dean was already in the dungeon making a deal to let Crowley walk free if Crowley could save Sam. Cass had unknowingly played into the hands of the opposition yet again by simply making Dean aware that Crowley could possibly save Sam.

"You can't be considering this."

"Why not, Cass?"

"Because you can't just let Crowley go. Sam wouldn't want you to do that. He'd want you to.."

"Yeah, well, Sam's not here, now is he?!" Dean bellowed. "Hell, Cass, you're the one who said that Crowley could get that bastard out of my brother!"

"But we both know that Crowley can't be trusted."

"That's why I'm not letting Crowley leave the bunker until I know for sure that Sam's okay."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm gonna bring the angel to us…"


	3. Chapter 3

"Depending on you."

A/N: Sorry for taking so long to update. My youngest child was in the hospital for 5 days because he got the flu and since he's still doing Chemo for the Leukemia, him getting the flu was a really big deal due to the fact that his immune system is already compromised. Thankfully he is better now and we are finally, back home. But it sucked because he went into the hospital at 2:00 a.m., Christmas morning which meant that our family didn't get to celebrate Christmas until my son and I got home on the 30th …

SO…

I've been avidly watching Season 1 Episode 1 through to the promos for Season 9 Episode 10 over and over again and there's some things that have been creeping into my headspace for a while now and events in Season 9 are beginning to really cement those things as being Canon for me… Obviously I can't say for sure that I'm right but it's beginning to look more and more like I am right about certain things at least.

Now… I'm not going to go into the things that I think that I'm right about in my Author's Note (right now)… Because.. Well… That would make my Author's Note super long.

Just know that I do my research of both all of the Canonical Lore and all of the Real Lore (that I can find).. Then I piece together theories about stuff… Then I write stories along the lines of those theories.

ANYWAY… Don't blame or flame me for the theories that research leads me to build.. I'm willing to do healthy debates through PM's… But I will not tolerate being publicly flamed..

Okay?... Now that all that's out of the way…

Onto the story….

~0~

"Depending on you."

Dean prayed to "Ezekiel" threating to track down every angel he possibly could and gladly tell them all that Sam Winchester was currently housing an angel that was considered an "Enemy of the State" for angels on all sides of the board… If "Ezekiel" didn't tell Dean where he was within the hour.

It was a good bluff. The angel possessing Sam had basically told Dean that Sam was gone for good, so that angel would have no reason to think that Dean wouldn't really hand him over to a hoard of angels out for his blood despite the fact that Dean's little brother was currently that angel's meat puppet.

It took only thirty minutes for "Ezekiel" to call.

The angel possessing Sam, was apparently really naïve. He agreed to meet Dean, to settle things like men. Of course Dean wasn't naïve and was prepared for the angel to try something underhanded. And of course Dean had a few underhanded things of his own planned.

The angel possessing Sam, had clearly underestimated Dean. A mistake made by many, a mistake that only a few lived to tell the tale about. A mistake that the angel possessing Sam wouldn't live to get a chance to regret making, let alone tell others about his folly.

Dean arrived at the place he and "Ezekiel" had agreed to meet, alone, just like "Ezekiel" had told him to.

Of course the angel possessing Sam had no idea that Dean had backup that was in the room next door, drawing sigils that would trap and paralyze the angel, so Dean could get close enough to bind him in newly made, specially designed chains that could conveniently hold an angel and keep that angel powerless.

Turns out… Getting the angel possessing Sam back to the bunker for Crowley to try to extract him was actually the easy part…

Getting that angel tied down in a chair and getting his (Sam's) head secured against the backrest as the angel declared how Sam was gone and how they could rip Sam's body apart but couldn't possibly extract him now that there was no one inside Sam's body to eject him, wasn't so easy…

Hearing the angel say that Sam was dead and gone, that was a crushing blow and things would have ended right then and there if Crowley hadn't held Dean back, claiming that Dean hadn't even given him a chance to try to fulfill his half of the bargain.

"You promised I'd walk out of here a free man if I got your brother back!" Crowley exclaimed "How the bloody hell can I hold up my end of the deal if you stab him with that thing?!"

Dean lowered the angel blade he was holding, if Crowley had reached out only a fraction of a nanosecond later, there would be no question of whether or not Sam was alive as the blade Dean was wielding had been mere inches from impaling Sam's heart.

"There is no getting him back!" The angel possessing Sam snapped. "He is gone!"

Dean looked wrathful, but he made no move to try to kill the angel again as Crowley began to survey the implements of torture that he was about to be putting to use.

That's when that little voice inside Castiel's mind decided that this seemed wrong.

"Dean.." Castiel stated tentatively "You can't be considering this. He's about to torture that angel and if Sam is indeed still in there, then he will feel every bit of pain that Crowley inflicts on his body."

"It's the only way to get Sam back." Dean replied tersely.

"You just cannot accept that he is truly gone. Can you?" The angel asked tauntingly. "You cannot accept that you have well and truly failed him. That there is absolutely no way to save him to this time."

"Do me a favor and shut him the hell up." Dean growled at Crowley. "I don't wanna hear another word outta that mouth unless it's Sam talkin."

The angel possessing Sam sneered at Dean "You should be glad he isn't in here. He would hate you for letting this happen to him."

"Shut 'im up right now, before I stab him in the face just on principal." Dean barked the order.

The angel turned Sam's head to avoid the piece of fabric that Crowley was trying to force inside Sam's mouth as he replied "You just do not wish for me to reveal all of the times you have abandoned your brother or just how many ways that you failed him, just how many ways you betrayed him.." Dean turned away from the angel and tried to keep his temper in check, he really did. But the angel kept talking and Crowley, the bastard, wasn't really trying very hard to shut him up.

"I think you fear that I will speak of the time when you left Sam in the clutches of two child raping murderers while you were too busy performing acts of Hedonism to take your thirteen year old brother's phone call. Or perhaps you are afraid that I will talk about the time when Sam was only four and you left him inside the cabin with the child molesting babysitter all so you could go play on a shoddy tree house that was covered in Poison Ivy."

Dean spun around and shouted "What the hell are you talkin about?! I wouldn't have ever let anyone touch Sam like that and you damn well know it you lying bastard!"

"Not lying, Dean." The angel stated callously "I have seen your brother's memories. All of them.. Even the ones that were buried by the wills of outside forces or repressed by Sam himself as a survival mechanism. You would be surprised to not only know just how many times Sam's memories, actions and state of mind have been manipulated by outside forces, but also who all has ever had a hand in manipulating what Sam would or wouldn't remember about things that either happened to him or things he was forced to do against his will."

"Right… Well unfortunately for you. No one's ever messed with my memories and I'm the one who was with Sam damn near twenty-four, seven when he was still a kid. There was never a moment where something like that could have happened to him. I made sure of it. So just shut your lying trap right now or so help me I will shut it for you."

"Never a moment where something like that could have happened?" The angel asked mockingly causing Dean to try to charge towards the bound angel, but Castiel restrained him.

"I told you to shut up!" Dean bellowed.

"Why? Afraid that I will point out how it did happen without you ever knowing about it? Afraid to know just how badly you failed your brother, how you betrayed his trust, right when he was depending on you the most?"

"Shut him up, get him out and get my brother back right now!" Dean roared at Crowley.

"You truly are afraid." The angel sneered. "Sam was afraid too, when I unlocked all of his memories and showed him what all was hidden in his mind, he was in too much pain to even try to keep living. The pain of the things you did to him and the things that you allowed to happen to him is what pushed your brother into the oblivion that I discarded him in. He is gone, he died because of all the times you failed to question just what the bigger picture might be. Your brother is dead Dean. And you are the reason he died."….

TBC….


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I'm not trying to sound needy or anything… BUT... There haven't been as many reviews as I've been hoping for and I'm totally about to be bringing the SUPER ANGST! I need to know that I'm loved!

*shouts "I NEED TO BE LOVED!.. ALL I WANT IS TO BE LOVED!"*…

Yeah.. Okay.. Maybe that's a little too much.

But I seriously do need to know that my work is liked. I can see how many people view each Chapter in my 'Story Stats' and I'm getting like thirty readers a chapter that's NINETY READERS so far, yet I've only gotten 7 reviews total that leaves the opinions of at least EIGHTY-THREE readers unaccounted for.

ANYWAY… You guys get the idea… PLEASE review!

Now onto the story…

~0~

"I can get Sam back." Crowley stated as he blocked Dean from trying to stab the angel again.

"Not from where I left him." The angel possessing Sam taunted.

"There's only two places in the entirety of GOD'S creations that I cannot enter or access and there is only one being that holds the ability to actually access either of those places and you are not HIM and neither is Metatron, no matter how much that jumped up little piss-ant of a secretary would like to pretend that he is."

"No, neither Metatron nor I can access any the places of which you speak. But that doesn't mean that Metatron could not just create access to someplace new. Someplace especially designed and equipped for containing the soul of someone such as Sam Winchester. And it is indeed a place to which only Metatron holds the key."

"So that's it?" Dean asked tersely, sounding like his carefully built façade was cracking "Sam's really gone?" Dean's voice was mournful, edging towards panic and rage, if someone didn't do something soon…

There was a loud *CRASH!* as Dean flipped one of the long tables in the library over onto it's side, causing all of the books piled on it's surface to tumble into the floor. Then there was a *CRACK!* as Dean kicked a chair across the room causing it to shatter into splinters as it collided with the wall.

"GOD DAMN IT!" Dean roared. "SON OF A BITCH! YOU GOD DAMN SON OF A BITCH!" Dean screamed the last directly into the angels face, not caring how bits of saliva flew into the face that was once that of his brother. "I trusted you!"

"Just like Kevin Tran trusted you?" The angel asked tauntingly.

No one could stop the fist that suddenly flew out and struck the angel in the face. Dean cradled his hand muttering how 'hitting an angel still hurts like a bitch even when their batteries aren't fully charged'.

The angel behaved as if he hadn't even felt a thing as he boldly asked "Or the way SAM trusted you?"

"Son of a bitch!" Dean hissed as he lunged to attack the angel again, but Crowley blocked his way.

There was a thoughtful look on the crossroad demon's face as he repeated what the angel just said "Sam's in a place that is specifically designed and equipped for containing the soul of someone such as Sam Winchester? Is that correct?" The former (or current, according to Crowley's views) 'King of Hell' asked the angel.

The angel nodded, making Crowley's face light up with a gleeful smile as he looked over at Dean and said "I know exactly where Sam is. And Metatron may be the only one holding the key to where Sam is, for now, but that doesn't mean that the locks keeping Sam imprisoned can't be picked."…


End file.
